Liam looked through the pile of scrambled pages again and again. He had a lot of sheets lying around, all of them trying to finish the song, the last song he had worked on together with Charlie, the last one before they finally broke up the band for good, the song "about two brothers".

Ironic how
I never saw you standing there
Ironic how

Some of the pages only had one line on them, others had the front and back all covered with letters, but nothing seemed to make sense.

Long nights of cold
Lost you to hold
Never been good
But always gave it a try

His lines didn't seem to match the lines that were left from their work so many years ago. But when he read Charlie's lines he still had the melody playing in his head. He couldn't hand Charlie a finished song today. Today, when Charlie finally came back from hospital. He had tried his best, but didn't succeed. Maybe it was a sign that - even if it was only for that song - he shouldn't go back on stage. His life had seemed normal, good, nearly perfect after he got rid of the heroine. Until Charlie came back. Until he came to ask him to re-join the band, until his plane crashed, until he finally was found, until he was threatened by Sawyer. Liam had given up his life once again, only this time it was for Charlie, not the drugs.

Charlie sat up in the hospital bed, stretching out the aches and pains of being in bed for far too long. He winced as he felt the pull on the newly healed gash across his stomach, a souvenir from the surgery. He was alright though, he was alive. There was nothing more important than that. He got to go home and see Aaron and Claire, to sleep in their bed again, and sing to their child. Well, hers. But it was his family. And he was planning on making it final very soon.

Liam hadn't seen his son since he had been to Manchester, and he had seen Meghan only once. He didn't remember what he had told her and he didn't know what Karen had told her, but he knew his daughter wasn't stupid and that she'd know - no matter what her parents told her - that something wasn't right at all. Though he had quite a huge dose back in Manchester he had managed not to let the drugs take over his life again. He had done as much as he could to save his family, but it hadn't been enough.

Claire came by about midday to pick him up, Aaron in her arms. Charlie happily held the boy, laughing with delight to finally be able to. Claire took pictures of the two of them, and started packing up Charlie’s stuff. It felt so good to get back into clothes again, it surprised him. Claire went to go talk with the doctors one more time and to check him out while Charlie sang to Aaron again, smile never leaving his face.

The longer Liam tried to find something that could go together and match the song the more aggressive he got because he couldn't seem to find something. He looked at Charlie's lines which he had pinned onto the wall.
"Together now, we can be saved."
Liam snorted derisively. He had once believed this.

The family left the hospital smiling, Charlie looking up and breathing in the fresh air as he walked to Claire’s car, feeling weak but happy.

Exhaustion crept through Liam's bones, but he still didn't feel like giving up. He had been up for 40 hours at least now, but he would stick to coffee rather than go to bed. Charlie was family, so he had the chance to show at least one person of his family he was able to do something right. He wanted that song finished before he'd see Charlie again.

Charlie talked to Claire amiably, asking about Liam for the first time in almost a week. His brother hadn't been by much, just stopping in. "Is he well? All he tells me is that he's working on 'the song' but doesn't elaborate".

Liam left his post at the desk only to go to the toilet or get more coffee. There wasn't much more he would do or wanted to do or even had to do. Officially he was still on parental leave though he hadn't seen the baby since the day when he had run to Manchester.

Charlie set foot at home again for the first time in nearly two weeks. It was really great. The entire house was washed in sunshine, making it look more welcoming than ever. He set his bag down on the floor, walking around the main room, pulling in the scent of baby powder and clean floors.

Liam was glad he could stay at the extra apartment in his colleague’s house; He couldn't imagine being in a hotel with some maid asking if he needed something every day. But he would have to find a better solution than this anyway. Who wants to be watched over by some colleague?

Charlie was immediately ushered upstairs by Claire, who plopped Aaron on the bedroom floor while she hustled Charlie into bed. She then put Aaron on the bed with Charlie, and went downstairs to make some food for them all. Charlie cuddled up against his boy's hair, singing them both to sleep.

"Never knew / we would be saved"
He must have been less knackered and less pessimistic when he had written this. It seemed to may fit the song, but not in Liam's current condition. In his condition he wasn't even able to think straight enough to not turn the song into something more depressing than Coldplay songs.

Charlie didn't know how long he slept, but it was the most restful sleep he'd had in a long time. When he awoke, he found Aaron gone, and smelled food cooking. He smiled. Picking up the phone by the bed, he called Karen, meaning to call her to ask if she could baby-sit Aaron tonight, because he wanted to take Claire out.

Liam's mood and concentration had dropped to its lowest point. But he couldn't sleep - another reason why he hadn't been in bed for two days now. Everything he had had to think about lately seemed to be unable to go out of his head and keeping him awake. Liam decided to go for a walk, without any destination.

Karen picked up the line, sounding harried and tired. "Hey, Karen, I'm home!" Charlie said, and she laughed, saying she was glad to hear him sounding so happy again. "Yeah, I feel great. I was thinking about taking Claire out tonight, would you be able to watch the kid?" Karen mumbled something about not being sure, she was pretty weighed down because Liam was gone.

Liam really didn't know where he was walking or where he was heading to, he was staring on the ground and just kept walking. The fresh air felt good, and it was helping to make him tired, so when he would get back he might be able to sleep.

Karen told Charlie she'd call him back and hung up, leaving him in his thoughts. Where was Liam, if not at home? Why wasn't he home? Had Karen kicked him out? He felt so out of the loop, he couldn't stand it. He put on some clean clothes and went downstairs to ask Claire.

When Liam looked up once during his walk, he recognized he was near his "old" neighborhood. He sighed, feeling a twitch running through his stomach and heart. It felt still terrible having been kicked out, again but as she said the last, final time.

Charlie listened to Claire intently. "So she's not letting him back in? Ever? Well bollocks..." He said, covering his mouth as he realized he'd almost sworn in front of his child. "What's he supposed to do?"

Liam swallowed hard, and walked on, doing his best not to go closer to Karen's for she'd freak out if he did without being asked or allowed to.

Though Charlie was a bit mad at Claire’s lack of support for Liam, he had to admit she had a point. He had scared the familiy to death and could have ended up completely drugged for life again. So he didn't say anything except "Can we find a baby sitter for tonight? I'd like to take you out."

Liam wasn't surprised when he found himself in another familiar neighborhood some time later. It would have been pointless though to go and ring at Claire and Charlie's, they sure wanted to spend time alone and he didn't have a reason to see Charlie, because he hadn't finished the song.

Charlie went out to get his last bag, which he'd forgotten in the back seat of the car while Claire called babysitters. Going outside slowly, he saw someone familiar walking nearby. Narrowing his eyes, he tried to get a better look. "Liam?"

Liam looked up very shyly only to mumble "hey Charlie" Then he bend his head again and wanted to walk on.

Charlie raised an eyebrow. "You ok mate? You don't look so good." He wanted to approach his brother, but his very stance was completely closed off to such gestures.

Liam stopped, looking at Charlie. "Naw, am not. Thanks for asking anyway." He actually would have liked to have someone he could talk to and who'd understand him - at least to some extend - but he didn't want to bother Charlie at all, so he tried not to look too needy.

Charlie got his bag, setting it on the ground before going to his brother. "If you need to talk, I'm here for you bro, kingdom come and until the world ends." He hugged him briefly, giving him a reassuring smile before heading back towards the house.

"Charlie?", Liam waited for his brother to trn around. "I... well, thanks, I appreciate that, but I don't want to bother you tonight, I guess you'd rather want to be alone with your family, so don't mind me, okay?"

Charlie paused mid step, spinning around on the heels of his toes. "You're free? You wouldn't..." He paused, thinking how to word the question. "I'm trying to take Claire out, but I can't find anyone to take care of Aaron. Would you be interested?"

Liam would have loved to. He was glad about any distraction, though maybe taking care of Aaron wasn't really curing his longing for his own children but probably rather saddening him more, but at least he could be of some use. Well, if Charlie really wanted him to that was, because Liam was sure Charlie had heard of him being kicked out and he wasn't sure if he wanted someone like him to be alone with Aaron. "You sure you'd want me to?" he asked.

Charlie smiled. "Liam, you're my brother. There's no one I would rather have." He paused, thinking about what Claire would say. She had said she didn't have a problem with Liam personally, but with her son is something different. Throwing that aside, he said "I trust you, Li."

Liam smiled softly and touched at his brother. "Thank you Charlie." He said, slowly coming nearer to him. "How are you anyways?"

Charlie laughed breathily. "Weak, and it annoys the crap out of me." He lifted his shirt to show off the straight scar across his belly. "Should add to my collection, no?"

"Looks quite... horrible!" Liam said, looking at the scar. "But somehow scars become you. But only somehow, don't go get more of them by purpose. And about the weakness, I'm sure it'll get better soon, don't you think?"

"One can only hope." Charlie said, leaning on Liam for support as they walked back to the house. "Its strange how I can feel completely strong and then fade in a matter of seconds. Most aggravating." He opened the door. "Stay here, I'll check with Claire first."

Liam only nodded. He was a bit nervous now. He was aware that it was one thing if Charlie trusted him, but it was definitaly another story what Claire would think about him taking care of her boy.

Charlie went into the kitchen, asking Claire. She hesitated, clearly conflicted. She said she didn't know. "Look, I'll give him our cell numbers, he can call us. Claire, please, I trust him, and we need to show him that we do. Its the only way he'll heal." Claire agreed finally, and Charlie went back to tell Liam the news. "Its ok bro, come on in."

Liam smiled thankfully at Charlie and went into the kitchen to thank Claire, too, for her trust. It felt good to know there were still people who cared about him - at least to a small extend.

Charlie got Aaron, bringing him to the kitchen to Liam. "I'm going to go get ready, and you should too Claire. Dress nicely." He winked at Liam, ushering his girlfriend upstairs.

Liam took Aaron by the hand, going into the living room with him. "Now little man, how do we want to spend our evening together?" Aaron let go of Liam's hand and went to the back of the room, where some of his toys were, telling Liam to come with him.

Charlie dressed quickly, going to Claire and kissing her neck as she put a simple silver necklace around it. "You look beautiful, baby." She smiled and inquired about all this fancy behavior. He just smiled wickedly, kissing her again. "Shhh... can't tell. Will ruin the surprise!"

Liam enjoyed playing with Aaron, even though it was rather piling building bricks just so Aaron could destroy the tower again and again.

The couple went downstairs to find Liam playing blocks with their son. "Aaron, you're not letting Liam be a very good architect." He laughed, sitting next to Liam. "He can stay up till 8:30, then just put him to bed. There's Mac and Cheese you can give him or Ramen, whichever he wants. We'll be back late-ish, but shouldn't be too late. Do you need me to write this down?"

"No you don't have to write that down", Liam said, adding a whispered "wanker" since Aaron didn't need to hear that. "I am capable of taking care of a child, if you believe it or not. Now go, have fun, enjoy yourself."

Charlie laughed. He leaned down to give Aaron a small kiss, then stepped aside to let Claire do the same. The little boy kissed both parents with a smile, then turned to Liam as if to say 'don't I have the best family?' Charlie smiled fondly, steering Claire out the door. "Night Liam. Good Luck!"

Liam and Aaron kept playing bricks for quite a while and Aaron even let Liam help him build a brick town through which he could run his little cars, and destroy it again. Liam really enjoyed being with the kid.

Charlie took them to a very nice restaurant, leading Claire in, who looked at him playfully and suspiciously. If he hadn't felt so determined, he'd probably feel a bit stifled or weak, but now he didn't care.

Aaron was such a content child, it was really no problem to baby-sit that boy. When he got a little whiny, because he was hungry, Liam let the boy choose himself what he wanted to eat. Liam wasn't surprised Aaron preferred macaroni with cheese.

Charlie and Claire ate dinner peacefully, and Charlie was glad to see that she relaxed as the night wore on, not thinking about Aaron, or at least trusting Liam with him. He wanted to wait for just the right moment, but he had a feeling it wasn't going to come until after dinner.

Aaron ate just as every child eats in his age; some tiny desperate sigh escaped Liam, but he had promised to take care of the boy, and his mother wouldn't be too happy to find the floor dirty when coming home. Liam let Aaron play - more actually doodle - alone and cleaned up.

The couple finished dinner, happy and laughing, before Charlie suggested they go for a walk. They were near the ocean, so they walked along the shore, much like they used to on the island, but with more boats and people.

After Liam had cleaned up he took Aaron upstairs to change into his pyjama. The little guy was quite rebellious there, but he got better after Liam promised that he only had to wear it already but could stay awake a little more and that he would read to him.

Charlie paused on the beach, heart throbbing. It was chilly, but not uncomfortably so. He grabbed Claire's hand, pulling her to him, to her obvious delight. She was shivering slightly, and he wrapped his arms around her, watching the moon settle on the water. Then, as inconspicuous as he could, he pressed a small velvet box in her hands.

Aaron started to pull out a few of his books from the rack and brought them to Liam to make him read. Liam took the boy onto his knees and started with the top one of the pile.

Charlie kissed her gently behind the ear, whispering "You have my heart, my soul, everything that makes me whole. I belong to you, and only you. I wish to finally be joined with you, in heart and soul, for all of eternity. Will you wed me Claire?" Time seemed to stop, and he was pretty sure his heart was frozen in anticipation.

It didn't take long until Aaron got definitely more and more tired, but every time Liam tried to get up and bring him to bed, he got kind of hyper, running from Liam, throwing around his toys. Liam tried talking to him calmly and thinking of a way to get the boy to bed before Charlie and Claire would return. They said they'd stay out long, but he still wanted to rather have the boy sleeping soon than have him be still awake when his mother returned late.

Charlie's heart began to beat again. Claire sealed her mouth to his, whispering 'yes' over and over again against his lips. Charlie's insides flew, and he grabbed her so tightly he was sure he'd break her. he had no idea how long they stayed like that, but Claire's shivering alerted him. "We should get home, or you'll get sick." He pressed a small kiss to her forehead, and they began to walk again.

After Liam helped Aaron to tidy up again, he offered him to stay with him in bed for some time. He explained to him, as simple as he could put it, that his mum and Charlie would be sad if he was still out of bed, playing, when they got home, but as long as he was in bed it wouldn't be that bad if he was still awake. And surprisingly it worked, and just as Liam had hoped he also fell asleep rather soon. Liam nonetheless stayed with Aaron not to wake him up again.

Charlie and Claire drove home, not speaking, but holding hands between the seats. Charlie knew he probably would never feel as happy as he did at this moment. Claire kept looking at the ring he'd given her, silver with diamonds and a single sapphire to match her eyes. The drive took a good twenty minutes, but they were content in each other’s presence.

When Liam heard the car stop in front of the house he silently and carefully got up, and went downstairs. He went into the kitchen and took a little piece of paper and a pen and scribbled down a short message. Then he folded the paper and put it into his pocket.

Claire led the way into the house, finding Liam quickly and giving him a huge hug and a kiss on the cheek before running upstairs to check on Aaron without a word. Charlie laughed, shrugging. "She seems pretty happy, at least!"

"Very happy indeed." Liam agreed. He was pretty confused and surprised by the huge hug and kiss, since only hours before he thought she'd reject him as a babysitter. "But you don't seem less happy, bro." re recognized.

Charlie beamed, laughing and slipping into the kitchen. "I didn't think I'd ever be able to go through with it." He handed Liam the empty ring box, hoping he'd understand fully.

Liam's eyes grew wide. "No way man!" He said his lips slowly turning into a wide smile. "Oh my god, that's some great news! I'm so happy for you, mate!" He said hugging his brother tightly. "That's so great!" he repeated.

Charlie met Liam's eyes straight on. He was actually surprised that Liam was so happy for him. Not that he was a bad brother or anything, just that if anyone had been against the marriage, it would be Liam, seeing as the two of them had been so intimately close for so long. But he smiled, pulling his brother back to him. "Thanks so much bro."

Liam really was happy for his brother, knowing that Claire was really right for Charlie. She had given him so much. And she had given him what Charlie had always wanted: a family of his own. But, sure, there were other feelings affecting Liam too. But he kept those down, they weren’t' - or rather he wasn't - important. "I'd better go then, hm?" He said smiling back at his little brother.

Charlie held his brother's arm. "Wait, stay for coffee! You've not had any time to relax, I'll wager. How was he?" He put a pot of coffee in the machine and sat down at the table, beckoning for Liam to join him. "Come on bro, we need to catch up!"

Liam bit his lower lip, sitting down with a heavy sigh. "It was... actually it was great. Aaron's a good boy, Charlie." he made little pause before adding "I miss my children."

Charlie sighed, reaching for Liam's hand. "What happened, Liam? Why did she kick you out? Is there any way you could go back, plead one more time?" The underlying question was really did Liam want to go back with Karen, or if he just missed his kids.

"You know what happened. She couldn't forgive me on that. She said she couldn't trust me anymore. I didn't want that to happen. I do love my family, Charlie. All three of them. Bit I fucked up big time and I don't know how or even if I could ever make up up for this."

Charlie just sighed. "Maybe... maybe you should just give them some space right now. Forcing them to accept you again won't make anything better. Its better to just accept that she isn't that interested right now, just get your life around, find steady work, start anew, you know?" He squeezed Liam's hand reassuringly. "Maybe you could stay here. We could use the help with Aaron, if you'd be interested." He gave Liam a hug around the table. "I'd have to ask Claire of course."

"I don't want to seem like a cadger, Charlie." Liam would have loved to stay with them, but he felt as if he was just some extra weight. He didn't want to depend on other people's pity.

Charlie raised an eyebrow, seeing that Liam wasn't going to go through this easily. "Fine, how about I make a deal with you big bro? You stay away for a week or so, find a good job, become even more respectable" Charlie laughed silently as he said that "and if you do that, you can come live here, help with Aaron, maybe help us with a few desperately needed repairs on the house, just until you've got enough money to get your own flat. What say you?"

Liam looked straight at Charlie. Then he slowly nodded. "Yeah. Yeah, sounds okay." Liam laid his hand on Charlie's and squeezed slightly. "Have I ever told you, you're the best brother ever?"

"Well, I've still got to confirm with Claire." As if on cue, she came into the room, no longer dressed in her fancy clothes, but pajamas and a dressing gown. She raised her eyebrow in alarm, but Charlie sat her down on his lap and explained the situation to her. She thought about it for a few moments, but eventually agreed, saying they did need help with the house and Aaron. Charlie smiled. "Now you can call me the best brother ever."

"Dumbass. Either way you would have been. I wouldn't have lived to celebrate my 21st without you." Then he turned to Claire and gave her a small kiss on the cheek. "Thank you Claire." Standing up he said, "Gonna check for the coffee."

"What do you mean you wouldn't have lived to celebrate your 21st? You're bonkers, you know that, don’t you?" Charlie raised his eyebrow again. He felt like he was doing that a lot tonight.

Liam didn't answer right away. He took his time getting three cups and the pot of coffee and coming back to the table. Only after having sat down again he said: "I meant it just as I said it. You don't have to get that, but it's true."

Charlie furrowed his brow. "Elaborate, per favor." He said, seriously. He had no idea what Liam meant, but he was going to find out, dammit, if it was the last thing he did.

"Do you actually think I could have stand my family if there hadn't been you? I still think I would have freaked out one day and committed the biggest sin of all. And it surely would have been long before my 21st." Liam knew he hadn't ever mentioned anything like that before, but he had spent much time thinking about how life would have been without his little brother.

Charlie paused, coffee mug halfway to his lips before he set it down again. He didn't know what to think. Was his brother serious? It seemed maddening, to think of that, but Liam was really depressed in high school... he supposed it was possible. But he couldn't think of anything to say. Claire just patted Liam's arm, trying to comfort him best she knew how.

Liam stopped Claire by putting his hand on hers, smiling softly. "Sorry, I didn't mean to destroy the mood." Then he glared - ironically - at Charlie. "I told you I should have left as you came back."

Claire scoffed, saying he needed to stop being a prat, before going to Charlie and kissing him, so he woke from his reverie. He smiled, shaking his head. He had too much to be happy about right now to worry about the past. "So, we're going to be one big happy family now, are we?"

Liam took a deep breath and nodded very lightly. One big happy family. Where was the happiness for him? And if he hadn't screwed up this one big happy family would have three more members. But maybe Charlie was right and time was a great healer. And with Charlie's and Claire's help he would make it through that time.

"Don't worry Liam." Charlie said calmly. "Everything's going to work itself out. Just give it time. Now." He said, standing and waving his arms a bit dramatically. "Do you want to sleep here tonight? Or are you going to trek all the way back to your mates rundown shack?"

Liam shrugged. "I don't have anything here. And I don't think your stuff'd fit, skinny boy."

Charlie glared comically. "Shaddup, I'm not skinny." He really didn't want to make Liam walk all the way back to his friends flat, but he couldn't make him stay. "Come on, please stay. No one cares if you sleep in starkers, we'll just wash the sheets tomorrow."

Liam laughed. And actually he rather stayed here then walk back anyway. Here, after all, he still felt more at home than at his friend's flat. "Okay, I'll stay. But ... have you checked with Claire if that's okay?" He grinned cheekily at his younger brother.

Charlie glowered, but Claire took care of it for him, hitting Liam hard on the head. She pointed to the upstairs, ordering him to shower and get in bed. Charlie couldn't have loved her more if he tried.

Liam went upstairs rubbing his head. He stopped in the middle of the stairs. "May I at least have a towel? Please?"

"No." Charlie joked, but Claire hit him and followed Liam upstairs, to situate him with everything he'd need for the night. Charlie laughed and cleaned up the three mugs and the coffee maker, before heading up as well, desperate to get out of the fancy clothes he was in that made him itch.

Liam felt good. It was great to still have people he considered as family who cared about and trusted him. He felt happy. When he stepped out of his trousers he felt the paper that was still in his pocket. He unfolded it. 'Thanks to the grace from above my humbled heart is alive'. He laid it down at the sink and went on getting stripped and finally stepped under the spray of the shower.

Charlie and Claire made their way to their bedroom, holding each other’s hands as if they were afraid at being separated on the way. They smiled. They were finally engaged. Charlie felt a leaping sensation that no drug could have mimicked. He knew he was forever happy and content.

"That night I realized I didn't need to think of myself as the worst person in world, not worth any attention. It was all about opening up to help if you really need it. And I did need it. I did need them to show me the next step. I only needed to accept their help and doing so I felt being my own man again, though it sounds contradictional.
I got back into the life of work and I had a family which made me feel like I belonged."

~Liam